What is a bro? The term “bro” has been thrown around and flipped upside down from Southern California to New York. Many people like to refer to your average college frat boys as bros, however, that’s not really what defines a true “bro.” The term originated in the good ole Inland Empire (I.E.) of Southern California—where tattoos, dirt bikes and Kottonmouth Kings are a favorite amongst this subculture (they’re almost as bad as Juggalos). Are you a bro? Below are 15 reasons you or your friends may be victims of bro’ocide.
P.S. We highly recommend clicking on every hyperlink on this page for some serious visual laughs.
- They live in Southern California, more specifically the I.E. in predominantly crappy cities such as San Bernardino, Beaumont, Banning, Riverside, Rancho Cucamonga, Corona, and even Orange County; actually, a lot of parts of Orange County such as Huntington Beach (the I.E. by the sea), Newport Beach and almost every beach.
- They still drive lifted trucks; preferably white or black with huge monster truck tires and lame stickers on their back windows (So Cal, SKIN, Affliction, Metal Mulisha, etc.). Um, excuse me—1995 called, they want their brodozer back!
- Their entire wardrobe consists of Dickies, bandannas, black tube socks, white chunky skate shoes (even though they don’t skate), Afflicition, SKIN, Sullen, SRH, and Famous Stars and Straps T-shirts … ewww
- Their bodies are covered with lame tattoos that they decided to get once the whole “tattoo” trend started. A few favorites: matching swallows, nautical stars, So Cal pride, and those cool flames that run up the sides of their waists.
- They’re avid readers of SKINNIE magazine.
- Some of their favorite bands are the Kottonmouth Kings, Insane Clown Posse, Linkin Park, New Found Glory, Good Charlotte, and P.O.D.
- They use the words “juggalo”, “spade”, “weed” or “420” in their Hotmail and Yahoo email addresses.
- They’re active on Myspace, however, they’ll jump to Facebook once the new Myspace rolls out which we hear is actually pretty rad.
- Their drinks of choice are Coors Light, Monster Energy Drink and Jägermeister.
- They live for Super Cross and basically anything Moto X.
- They enjoy wearing flat-billed hats cocked to the side and when they’re feeling fancy, they sport a bandanna under their hat.
- They’re still sporting white framed Black Flys and Dragons from ’95.
- They love piercings—especially plugs, tongue rings, lip rings and/or eye brow rings.
- Their girlfriends have bleached platinum hair, heavy face make-up to cover the meth scabs and they wear those chunky marshmallow-like platform sandals that are made of some weird styrofoam.
- They still live with their parents at 30 but swear they’re ballers and own a clothing line. How many of those “bro” start-up clothing lines have you seen? You know what we’re talking about …
Got more ideas? Leave them in a comment below. Or if you’re a bro and want to defend your subculture, feel free to comment below.
This post is an update from our Aug., 2009 post, “15 Reasons You’re a Bro.”