2014 was a wild ride in fashion. It seemed to be an “everything goes” mentality that said, “if you wear it enough it will become the next big trend,” and yet most missed the mark (see Pharrell’s Arby hat). Clearly some things are not meant to be popular; they’re too ridiculous, too obnoxious or just downright ugly to become something society can be down with. Here are 15 fashion faux pas and misses that weren’t so hot in the “hot vs not” world of fashion. Don’t be that guy or girl wearing these looks in 2015.
1. Jean shorts were never meant to take the place of your underwear. Even Daisy Duke didn’t let Uncle Jesse see that much of her backside. Remember these girls?
2. Why you be carrying your $2k designer bag the size of a roller bag into a crowded venue? Downsize before the show, girl, and keep it simple with your ID, cash and credit card wrapped in a hairband and shoved in your back pocket. If you must roll with a fancy purse, go for a wrist clutch.
3. Please don’t wear your oversized-floppy-hippy-sun-hat to a night show. We used our hard earned money to see this show and we want to see. Save your sun hat for a day frolicking at the beach.
4. Be very careful, shredding your own clothes is the kind of DIY project that’s destined to go wrong even before you make the first cut. And if you’re going to try this look, please make sure you’re not wearing the clothing while cutting away. You may lose a boob or ball.
5. Jeans so tight your package is about to spring from the zipper like a jack-in-the-box is not something any of us need to see. So, boys, give the family jewels a little breathing room and loosen up those waistlines.
6. Everyone STOP wearing culturally insensitive costumes to festivals and concerts. We’re here to love our brothers and sisters of every color, race and creed, not to minimize their heritage by dressing in mocking costumes (especially when you don’t have a clue about the history).
7. Don’t dress all twins-y, triplet-y and sextuplet-y with your friends. Leave this look for the toddlers. Be yourself and own your personal style.
8. There’s no reason to dress as a Civil War reenactor unless you really are in a Civil War reenactment. Save the costume for that holiday we celebrate on October 31st .
9. We know you want to look hot so you can snag yourself a hottie, but you ain’t going to pull one wearing four-inch bedazzled platform heels you’re unable to stand in, let alone walk in with style and grace (don’t be this girl).
10. Fringe everywhere … fringe boots, fringe purse, fringe top, fringe shorts, fringe hair — you get the point here. If you’re gonna do the fringe, please use it in moderation. One item to your ensemble at a time, please.
11. Take a full spin in front of that mirror before you head out the door, baby, and make sure all them private parts are covered. Plumber’s crack is not a flattering feature on neither a woman or man. (Photo Credit: James Stafford)
12. Johnny Depp is the only person who can dress as Johnny Depp. Period. End of story.
13. Take it easy on the perfume, ladies and gents. Especially that pungent patchouli! Ain’t nobody got time to be suffocated by your powerful scent while at a show.
14. Newsflash: Furry cavemen boots (like these) don’t look good on anyone, including cavemen. Save them for Electric Daisy Carnival, actually, DON’T.
15. Don’t use your ipad as a camera. This isn’t fashion it’s common sense. Besides, who carries an iPad to a concert? Answer: Probably the same person that brings their oversized designer bag (see #2)
Feature by Anne-Marie Schiefer