Los Angeles’ artist Bea Miller has released their latest single and music video for “jealous of my friends,” a brutally honest and eviscerating new anthem. It’s the third single she’s shared this year alongside the previously released “cynical” and “lonely bitch” — clearly defining this new era for herself by its electrifyingly bombastic pop-rock sound. Making a slight shift from the electro-pop-fueled shock and awe that crackled from her elated! EP. Yet underneath the ever-changing sonics of Miller’s music, there remains this same insatiable and smoldering ability to rally her vulnerabilities into a source of resilience.
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With “jealous of my friends” she tackles a subject not easily talked or sung about with deft frankness. Against a combustive medley of rumbling riffs and concussive drums, Miller confesses a reflexive need to compare herself to and envy the lives of those around her. And not just complete strangers — something most people can relate to in the age of posting your idealized life on social media for others to begrudge — but friends as well.
As the track pummels around her, she edges closer towards howling catharsis in just being able to admit having (and not wanting) these feelings. Especially in realizing that such jealousy stems less from what others actually have and more from what you do not. Transforming her pointed introspection into an anthemic affirmation to others that might feel the same way. “I know you’re not supposed to say it,” she wails as the song thunders along. “And honestly I hate it.”
Thematically “jealous of my friends” fits neatly into BEA MILLER’S CABINET, a collection of 12 visualizers that will accompany each new release and will be created by Gina Manning. Both “cynical” and “lonely bitch” were the first two additions to this compendium and explored themes of monotony and disassociation respectively. The latest installment, directed by Manning and Mike Pecci, brings the song’s internalized envy into the foreground in a decidedly horrific way.
Under the glossy glow of a vintage-looking bedroom, Miller sits alone except for an ominous look shadow cast against the wall behind her. But as she starts singing the shadow becomes both sentient and monstrous as its fingers turn into long claws. An unnerving but woefully accurate representation of the very feelings Miller tries to wrap her head around throughout the song.
“‘Jealous of my friends’ is a song I was honestly a bit hesitant to release,” Miller said. “Nobody wants to admit that they feel anything but proud and excited for their friends when they accomplish or experience great things. I think though, that it’s only human nature to grapple with pride and jealousy every once in a while, and I’m hoping that if people relate to this song, they’ll be a little bit less hard on themselves for it, knowing they’re not the only one.”
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Words: Steven Ward
Watch the music video for “jealous of my friends” the new single from Bea Miller below!
